Monthly Archives: August 2015

Beard Update

Not had an up date on my beard for ages. I still have it. The beard that is!185009

Clit Eatswood, the beaver, comes and wiggles around in it quite often and certainly seems to enjoy the experience. It’s pleasant for me too.beard2

I must admit though I’m beginning to get a bit bored with it and thinking about having a Hollywood face in the near future. I’ll have to wait for the tan to fade though as a two-tone face is NOT a good look but then again having a beard and looking like Uncle Albert isn’t too great either. I will let you know if and when it gets shaved off.uncle albert

Have a smashing day.

More Dick soon.


So. Do You Feel Lucky Slug?

Before we all went on holiday, I had restarted making my experimental slug deterrent. Unfortunately, as I hadn’t said anything to PIL about it, she found what she believed to be a bucket of gooey rain water in the garden and poured it away. Back to the beginning again.hostas-being-terrorized-by-slugs

What with work, stuff to do around the house and a thousand other tasks that I hadn’t done to sort out before we went away, I didn’t get round to carrying out the experiment. We’re back now, the catch up at work and home has been caught so now it is time for my experiment. Or so I thought. My intention was to grow some plain green hostas as a kind of sacrificial goat. Slugs absolutely love eating hostas so it was an ideal plant to see if my slug deterrent worked. We have a number of hostas dotted around the garden that we grow in pots to avoid serious slug damage. They are one of PILs favourite plants.20150612_100411


The three that I had grown on had come along nicely and looked like they would make an excellent meal for a slug or several. I planned to plant one in the garden uncoated with deterrent, another lightly sprayed and the final one soaked in deterrent. I would plant them about 18 inches apart.

I came home the other night ready to start my testing the following day to find my sacrificial hostas in one pot outside the front door.20150808_162320

“Er excuse me. Why are those hostas outside the front door?” I asked PIL.

“Don’t they look lovely there? Thanks ever so much for growing them for me.”

“But, but, but…….” I stammered.

“When did you develop a stutter. Good God man, you really are going to the dogs.”

“I was going to use them for my slug deterrent test.” I managed to say knowing that I was on a loosing wicket here.

“Well you can forget that sunshine. Find something else. I like them and they are staying put.”

Oh bollocks! Looks like SDG and I will have to wait a while longer before we make our fortunes. Sorry about that.

Have a smashing day.

More Dick soon.



A few days ago I wrote a post about my sons graduation. Most of the post was of photos we had taken during the day as I felt they expressed how proud PIL and I are better than I could put into words. In one of the photos, the blonde girl standing behind Ed is obviously vexed about something.Ellgrad14

Many of you (ok, one of you) asked if I knew what it was about. I didn’t although I too was curious. So I carried out a thorough investigation. This is what I discovered:Ellgrad16

“I’ll just stand here so I can be seen.”


“Did you just grab my bottom?”

“Er. No. Never touched you.”

“Oh so it was the Ghost of Christmas Past was it? Someone did and you’re closest.”

“Perhaps it was Mr Tickle .”


“Listen pal. You touch me again and I’ll rip your arms off. I don’t want this official photo spoiled by a dork like you.”

“But it wasn’t me. Although I must say you do have a jolly nice bottom.”

“Watch it pal.”


“That’s no reason to grab it! Try it again and you WILL suffer the consequences. I am a black belt in Origami and I’ll fold you up like a flamingo.”

“Gosh! How splendid! I assure you however that I did not grab your bottom.” Then adding in a whisper;

” I merely caressed its lovely smooth curves.”


“Don’t even think about it sunshine.”

“Perfectly ok . Fancy a shag later?”




However, this only what I think happened and was said. It may have been something completely different. We will never know.

Have a great day.

More Dick soon.